A521.3.4.RB_Matthew-Napu Manglona_Personal Reflection
When it comes to sharing stories about my personal life and
situations from both my childhood and early adulthood that changed my life, it
is quite difficult to think of events that have impacted me because there are
so much that has happened to me in the last 20 years. I guess you can say as
Mckay, Davis, and Fanning (2009) had stated about self-disclosure, in regards
to “Increased Self-knowledge” that “The process of making someone else
understand your demands that you clarify, define, elaborate, and draw
conclusions.” (p. 25) is a statement that people can use to improve themselves
when they experience a particular event.
During the summer 1998 I was 10 years old I had just
received an invitation to try out for the Guam’s Under 10 National Baseball
team. I was excited to even be invited and could not wait to get to practice
and give it my all for it was a 3 day event. When I arrived to the field I was
competing with the island’s best Little League players with a total of 38
players showing up with only 15 able to be on the roster. The day was not going
as I expected, I guess you can say I was nervous being around all the other
good players. I was missing fly balls, not hitting the ball efficiently, and I
wasn’t fielding ground balls either. I wanted to quit. I remember telling my
dad at the end of the day I don’t want to go back. My dad was not having any of
it, as my dad was a hard man who believed that quitting is not the answer to
life’s problems.
He sat me down and told me his story of my grandfather who
disciplined him whenever the thought of quitting came in his head. I remember
my dad telling me, “Manglonas don’t quit son, you are something and better than
majority of the players out there, you just have to believe in yourself as I
believe in you.” That’s when he kept poking my chest (heart) and notifying me
that’s the place where the belief needed to come from. At 10 years old I
understood what he meant. So I went back out there and proved to myself most of
all and played the best that I could. It was that turning point when my dad
spoke with me where the pressure was off and I performed good enough to make
the team. I will always remember my dad telling me that little speech as it
carried me to be the person I am today. Foster (1999) discusses that, “One
powerful reason for parents telling stories to children is that the
story-telling event strengthens the parent-child relationship. It is part of
the learning process and new life experiences can be given meaning and context.”
(p. 13)
Another story I recall was when I was in 2013, I was 24
years old, and in Afghanistan. My mentor Maj. Santos got me involved with a
10,000 Kettle Bell swing challenge, in which you take a Kettle Bell and swing
it 500 times a day for a whole month in one training session. I did not want to
participate in the first place but I ended up doing it anyway. It was toward
the middle part of the challenge and about 2,000-3,000 kettle bell swings in
and I told him “Sir, why are we doing this? What are we getting out of this?
This is crazy sir!” He straight up told me “Get out of my gym, Napu! I don’t
want to hear your whining.”
I literally dropped a
tear when he said that and I walked out. I was surprised at what he said and was
not expecting him to say it. I was embarrassed and ashamed of myself. Later
that night he came to my bunk and spoke with me. He asked, “Do you know why I
snapped at you? I said what I said because you gave up on yourself before you
even tried, when you give up on yourself, you give up on your soldiers, who are
those same men you lead in battle. Think about the brothers who we lost who
would love to be in your position, which is to simply be alive.” He then shared
a story with me about him being in my shoes and saw himself in me. That he too
wanted to give up on the simple things and realized there were bigger issues
outside of us. It was that moment where
no matter what challenge is put in front of me whether it is physical or mental
I would never give up, complain, or whine about it.
For I know there are people
out there who I have to set an example for and people who would want to be
alive for the blessings that I have. O’Leary
states that, “Stories
help individuals make sense of the world and help leaders provide context.
Stories enable a person to see issues in a new light and help inspire people to
action” (p.11)
References:
Forster, N., Cebis, M., Majteles, S., Mathur, A., Morgan,
R., Preuss, J., . . . Wilkinson, D. (1999). The role
of story-telling in organizational leadership. Leadership
& Organization Development Journal, 20(1), 11-
17. Retrieved from
http://search.proquest.com.ezproxy.libproxy.db.erau.edu/docview/226914173?accountid=27203
McKay, M., Davis, M., & Fanning, P. (2009). Messages: The
Communication Skills Book (3rd edition).
Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications. (ISBN: 978-1-57224-592-1)
O'Leary, J. J. (2012). Telling the story: Teaching
leaders the art of storytelling and its impact on
individuals and the organization (Order No. 1518860).
Available from ProQuest Dissertations & Theses
Global. (1073424999). Retrieved from
http://search.proquest.com.ezproxy.libproxy.db.erau.edu/docview/1073424999?accountid=27203
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